The Art of the Spiel

An interesting thing
happened just the other day.
Watching TV, I noted
that my drink was quite empty

“Honey! There’s an emergency!”
with the slightest whine, I shouted.
“I think I spilled my drink!”
then, because it’s cute, I pouted.

She came in with a flash
and a bunch of paper towels
And, since I’d interrupted her,
the slightest hint of a scowl.

“Here, sop it up with this,
then go get a rag.
Wet it and wipe the floor,
So it won’t form a slag.”

“OK.” I reached out towards her
without turning from from the screen.
“Hey, and while you’re here,
could you refill my glass with tea?”

“Wait. Where is the spill?”
“I’m not exactly sure there’s been one.
But you know how often my drink gets spilled
when it’s on the edge or near one.”

“Did you just call me in here,
so I would get you another drink?
You asked me a few minutes ago
and I told you I was scrubbing the sink.”

“Yeah, but then I had this emergency.
I really need you to get me that drink.
I need to be here to clean up the spill.
And I can’t risk missing a thing”

“The spill that didn’t happen?
That’s nothing like a disaster.”
“OK. But, I thought you could
get me my drink much faster.”

That is the essence of communication
and reaching compromise in a marriage.
That is also why I am no longer getting any favors for a while.
But that was my goal all along.
Sometimes I get tired of all the winning.